Florida Man Wants To Open A Meeting With Satanic Prayer

Schadenfreude comes in many forms. There's of course the tasting of the Tears of Unfathomable Sadness, as well as the political equivalent of running up the score.

Well, now it comes in the category "Put up or Shut Up", otherwise known as "Be Careful What You Wish For".

Remember the Florida man who sued to put up a Festivus Pole on the State Capitol Grounds?

He's BACK! And he's going Next Level Religious Freedom. He's petitioning to have a meeting of his Town Council OR the Florida Senate open with a Satanic Prayer.

And he knows exactly what's up, too. The hypocrisy of religious fundamentalism is not lost on this guy. I don't know his beliefs, but I love his style:

Chaz Stevens — who made headlines last December when he forced Florida Governor Rick Scott to allow him to erect an 8-foot-tall Festivus pole made of Pabst Blue Ribbon beer cans next to Deerfield Beach’s nativity manger — told the New Times that he recently converted from “Pabstfestidian” because “Satan is a cool dude.”

“Think of all the people he’s in charge of,” Stevens said. “Do you want to be stuck listening to harp music in the afterlife? Hell no. I want to drink beer and hang with hookers.”

He then tacked to a more serious course, adding “I just want equal billing. We allow various religious nutjobs to give a prayer. They pray to Jesus who is make-believe, god who is make-believe, why not Satan who is make-believe?”

“Why discriminate against one make-believe god over another?” he continued. “Satan and I are being circumvented. The city of Deerfield Beach has once again declared war on religion — and this time it’s Satanism.”

Here are the texts of the letters he has written. Suck on those, Justice Kennedy:

   Dear City of Deerfield Beach;

    With the recent US Supreme Court ruling allowing “prayer before Commission meetings” and seeking the rights granted to others, I hereby am requesting I be allowed to open a Commission meeting praying for my God, my divine spirit, my Dude in Charge.

    Be advised, I am a Satanist.

    Let me know when this is good for you.

And this one was sent to Sherrie Routt, an Administrative Assistant with the Department of Management, to open a session of the Florida Senate:

   

Good morning to you. Hope all is well. I have two items that I need assistance with.

    1. I’d like to (once again) install my PBR Festivus Pole in the Rotunda during the upcoming winter holiday season.

    2. Given the recent US Supreme Court ruling (City of Greece, NY), I would like to open up a Session with a prayer to my god Satan. Kindly advise me how to seek approval for that.

It's go time. Now we get to see. According to the First Amendment and to this decision, they MUST allow the prayer. Stevens has already shown a willingness to go to court to get the result.

So now: Will the town and Senate just say yes? Will they fight it? If the Florida Supreme Court says no, will he go Federal? If this gets back to SCOTUS, will Town of Greece v. Galloway get overturned?

It's just so easy to Admiral Akbar the right wing Christianists.

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